You are knee deep in wedding planning: calling vendors left and right, spending countless hours researching, and getting recommendations from friends. All your free time is dedicated to wedding planning. Naturally you delegate some things that you don't really care about to your future husband. You don't have strong feelings about the DJ, so you give your man free reign to choose whomever he likes as long as you don't have to think about it. Flash forward to your wedding night and the DJ your new husband hired has announced everyones names wrong and has played three songs that were on the "Do Not Play" list.
Will anyone really remember the names were wrong? Probably not. Was the day ruined? No. Could this have been avoided so that you are dancing along to your favorite jams instead of walking off the dance floor irked? Absolutely yes. The solution is simple: plan together. Think of planning your wedding as marriage training. Here are three tips for doing that well!
1. Divide the tasks. Decide together.
He gets down on one knee, smile on his face, tears in his eyes and asks you if you will be his one-and-only for the rest of forever, and you say yes! Unless you are a professional planner you are about to have the biggest and most important to-do list of your life. The key, right from the get go, is to tackle it together. One person may be more logistically minded than the other and that is great! (They can manage the list). The tasks naturally should be divided, but make the final decisions together!
2. Give Options
Try not to get your heart set on one particular vendor. You might be surprised by the strong opinions your future spouse has about certain things or the vendor you had your heart set on might not be as good of a fit as you originally thought. It is more work but do your research because it is worth it to know the vendor you have chosen is perfect for you two. Find at least three different possibilities for each type vendor. Look at their recent work and reviews, and keep in mind that the most budget-friendly choice might not be the best long-term investment. Presenting your fiancé with options and pros and cons will make for an easy and educated final decision.
3. Make Sure it's a Good Fit
With all of the things looming over your head, it is easy to just pick the most convenient choice: the videographer from your cousin's wedding, the makeup artists your mother-in-law found, or the girl you knew from high school as your florist. Recommendations like these are great (it's the way most people get in touch with me) but do not pick them only because it is the convenient option. Make sure a vendor is a good fit for you two personally before you make the final decision. The videographer from your cousin's wedding could possibly be a good option but there is also an equal chance you might end up with a product you hate. Just because that vendor worked for someone you know does not mean they will work you. Your love story is unique and different than anyone else's and you need to make sure the vendors you choose are right for you two specifically. Talk with the vendors you are pursuing face to face and prepare questions to ask them.
Though wedding planning can seem overwhelming, don't forget the reason why you are doing all of this work: because you are committing to spend the rest of your life married to your beloved! Lean on him now as you are sure to do in all of the years to come!
P.s. What has been the most challenge part of wedding planning for you?